Kuya Dhen By Darlene Ramos

Kuya Dhen
By Darlene Ramos

Kuya. It’s a Filipino term, roughly translated as “older brother”. But there are things lost in translation, things like “protector”, “ally”, “confidante”. This is Kuya Dhen’s story.

Dhen Harold came to CCFT two years ago with his two sisters, Sarah and Jairah. Abandoned by their mother and father, the weight of responsibility was laid on Kuya Dhen as the eldest child. With the pressure of being accountable for his siblings, Dhen was at first a rigidly stubborn boy, silent and resentful of authority. There would be periodical bursts of anger that he would turn on his younger siblings – for he was with his fellow boys in one family at the Children’s Home while his sisters were in another in the girls’ wing. At playtimes, reunited, the three could be found together talking and bonding, as siblings will when they only have one another to cling to.

Over time, Dhen slowly learned to also be a Kuya to the siblings in his assigned family. Given the lead child role, he would call them to line up during mealtimes and going to school, and make sure that the family was on schedule. To cope with his bouts of impatience and occasional annoyance with his siblings, therapist Viviene Francisco helped him out by teaching him to use an anger dial to control his anger. The reward for all this – a spot at the Top Ten of the Children’s Home this January, along with his sister Sarah.

School was also an important outlet for Dhen, for he excelled in Mathematics and Physical Education and was awarded Number Smart and Body Smart during the second quarter of this school year. He has become fast friends with his fellow second-graders and the school band where he plays the snare drum, some of whom also call him “Kuya”.

Kuya is a term of endearment, and encompasses not only blood relations, but friendships built from common losses, shared joy, and challenges faced together. This is Kuya Dhen’s story, in words, but the child is far, far more.